The Ultimate Best Friend L05

   I thought it was very interesting throughout the week how we learned about how things can tense up fast in a marriage, especially if there is poor communication. I have seen in so many marriages stonewalling, it's fascinating how this keeps the other person out but traps the stonewaller inside. I have seen a lot of marriages where stonewalling has been something they have not been able to overcome, it can in the end be so detrimental to the couple. I think it is especially interesting how one or two stonewalling incidents by one particular individual in the couple just cause a damage that could potentially damage everything they have potentially worked for.

   I think it is super duper important in the same way Gottoman believes to have a great friendship with your spouse.I have seen that if you are genuinely good friends with your spouse and have a lot in common then when things get very tough you have have the basics to fall back on. In most marriages that very good friendship is what keeps the love alive when maybe the romance is living on the edge. I think this is so monumental because it is hard to get to a place where you feel completely lonely when you know you at least have a friend in your marriage. I also think this super important because being able to laugh and smile even when things are really hard is what could potentially carry you through your difficulties your marriage is going through. 

   It is interesting that Gottoman spends so much time diving into this, I know personally from the advice of couples who have been together for decades "friendship is key". I think that being friends with the person you plan to spend the rest of your life with is crucial because it is hard to stay in love with someone you aren't even friends with.

    I personally am so grateful for the man I have in my life, because even when we are in a pickle I know that he is my best friend. I will do anything for my best friend , and I know he will do the same for me.I know we enjoy our time together whether it be walking down the beaches in California or grocery shopping in Walmart. We have fun because we are great friends